I'm gonna soap box for a minute re: the coverage of the Steubenville rape case.

First off, no one "asks" to be raped. That's a fucking cop out, and they know it. Slut shaming and blaming rape victims is reprehensible, and there's a special ring of hell for rapists and their sympathizers.

As for the media feeling sorry for these two "kids" with promising futures? If they cared that much about their futures, they would've kept their dicks in their pants. That simple. They took advantage of this girl's inebriation. And then her name gets published and aired in the news? Way to go there, media. Add to this girl's pain, you cold-hearted assholes. What about HER future?

So, now you're asking why I'm posting this here. Because I make sexy clothes. If any girl wearing one of my designs was raped and people blamed her clothes, I'd sure as hell take offense. But even more importantly, I've been there. Twice. Once as a child, once as an adult. In my case, I fought hard to take my life back, especially since the one of the fuckbags is still out there and will never see a courtroom or jail cell for what he did to me. I do what I do because I believe in strong, beautiful, sexy women who shouldn't be afraid to show it. This girl will have a harder time recovering because--not only were her rapists painted as victims and her name outed--but because some of these disgusting viewpoints CAME FROM WOMEN. We need to be lifting each other up, not putting each other down. Healing will be slow, but with enough support, it will happen.

I'm not saying I'm completely fine, by the way. I've been carrying this cross for most of my 29 years. I have trust issues, I'm so shy it's ridiculous, I'm not a big fan of people, and I hate being touched by strangers. What a great industry I chose to be in, eh? I'll be honest: it helps me. My first burlesque performance terrified me (see below). As you can see from some of the pictures from Full Steam Eugene, so did my first runway show, so I thought back to my burlesque days. If that wasn't evident. (Again, see below.) I watched a few major Fashion Week videos to get over that before EFW '12. If not for my husband of five years challenging me to put myself beyond my comfort zone, I don't think I could do this. The feedback from everyone else helps a lot, too!

Way too much physical flair for the catwalk.

 I don't walk all theatrical anymore, I promise.

Hiding the terror. Oh, and about 50 lbs smaller.

Moral of the story: CNN and everyone else who are lamenting the rapists instead of the rapee are dicks. Plain and simple. The healing process is hard enough. This kind of behavior is counterproductive to societal progress and to the continued healing of rape victims EVERYWHERE. I'm lucky enough to have found outlets, but there are so many who aren't so fortunate. It's time to stop stigmatizing rape victims. The ones who made them that way are the ones to be stigmatized. As with so many other issues, it's time to stop playing this figurative tug-of-war that leans too far in the wrong and regressive direction. And I wish all the best for this young woman who had a little too much fun and paid for it in one of the worst ways.

Now, I'm gonna go put together a hot little number for a fierce model who'd likely make a potential rapist very sorry they even had the thought.

Cajun Seasoning

I'm going to put it out there: I *love* Cajun and Creole food. I especially love cooking it. But a good all-in-one seasoning is hard to find. Unless you're my dad, who stocked up on Cajun seasoning on a work trip to New Orleans. I don't have any hope of squeezing a jar out of him. So what's a girl to do when she wants to make a good gumbo?

She figures out how to make her own.

Thanks to various sources found through Google, I cobbled together a recipe for Cajun seasoning that I now have a jar of.

Here's what's in my jar:
-10 t salt
-10 t garlic powder
-12.5 t paprika
-5 t onion powder
-7 t cayenne powder
-6.25 t dried oregano
-6.25 t dried thyme
-5 t red pepper flakes

This has quite the kick, but not too much, as the hubby isn't a huge fan of eating fire. It can, of course, be made hotter or milder.

Try it and let me know what you think!

Room Spray

If you like a delight burst of scent in your home, but don't want to use all kinds of chemicals, then I have an inexpensive and natural solution!

It's quite simple, really: herbal tea and several drops of essential oil in a spray bottle (mist setting). My favorite combination is chamomile tea and rose oil. Though, right now, I don't know where my rose oil is, so I'm using dragon's blood. I usually spray it into my curtains, furniture, and carpets, as well as the air. Occasionally, I use it on clothing, luggage, and anything to do with the cats. Plus, very cost effective. Especially if you're the type who grows their own herbs/flowers, and/or makes their own essential oils. Which gives me an idea...

Key Lime Cheesecake with Oreo Crust

I can't recall if it was my ex-fiance or my mother-in-law, but I developed a love for key lime desserts as an adult. I gobbled up the flavored yogurts and store-bought dessert mixes, but last year, I decided I wanted something more. So, I looked up a cheesecake recipe. Simple enough. Except that key limes are incredibly hard to find here, apparently. I eventually ended up buying a pre-packaged bag of about 30 key limes at Market of Choice. Then I had to go buy a citrus juicer. Which, by the way, juicing a lime half about as big as half a golf ball SUCKS.

Well, my husband saw that The Cheesecake Factory now offers a chocolate key lime cheesecake, and requested I make one (we don't have a local CF). So I dusted off this recipe, and made a few changes. (Recipe will be available in a .pdf format at the end.)

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I started by changing the crust from graham cracker to Oreo. You can buy pre-crushed Oreos, but that takes the fun out for me. So I put the de-cremed cookies into my little food processor. This came out to be a little over 1/3 C (15 Oreo sandwiches minus the creme).

I then added 5 T melted stick butter (unsalted), and mixed it in. This was followed by the mixture being pressed into the bottom of a 9” spring form pan, and baked for 5 minutes at 350*. (Note: Spraying the pan is optional.)

While the crust was in the oven, I put the cream cheese, vanilla, and sugar into a bowl, and used my electric mixer until it was combined and smooth.

After I pulled the crust out of the oven, I added the eggs and key lime juice to the cream cheese mixture.

When it was well-beaten, I poured it into my pan, and popped it in the oven.

(Note: Sadly, in our litigious society where common sense is not so common, I have to tell you to not eat the uncooked filling like I did. Raw eggs and disease and blah blah blah. Unless you’re like me, and have never once gotten sick from licking the bowl/spoon/spatula/beaters while baking. Then carry on. But if you eat the filling and get sick, it’s not on me.)

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I've learned tonight that the kitchen timer on my microwave can't always be counted on. As a result, my cheesecake was in a few minutes longer than it needed to be. I'm sure it's fine, but I won't know for sure until I serve it up after my husband and I have our anniversary dinner tomorrow night. But you don't really want it this dark:

***********************To Be Continued*********************

Key Lime Cheesecake with Oreo Crust Recipe 

Handmade Christmas

When I got married in 2008, I instantly became an aunt to 6 (don't quote me on that number--I may be off). While most were already adults or on the brink of adulthood, I still had my now 13 year old niece to dote on. Over the last few years, I've made her dresses, jewelry, and even a stuffed kitty. This year, however, I will be doing gifts for all three nieces (13, 4, and 4 months), and my first biological nephew (also 4 months).

The newly-minted teenager is not entirely difficult; she never really has been. I'll send her a handmade card with a picture and a cute pair of earrings (maybe two). The younger ones really got me thinking. What's okay for toddlers and infants? What's a big no-no? After walking around the mall with my sister and nephew looking at baby hats (or the lack of), I decided to do fleece winter accessories. Winter is long and cold in Oregon, so it just made sense.

Not being a parent myself, I posed a question to friends and family who are: are scarves okay for infants and tots? The response was varied from no (choking hazard) to yes (parental discretion). After discussing it with my sister, I decided on a mini quilt, a fleece cap, fleece mitts, and a fleece scarf for my nephew. I'm decided on caps for my little nieces (with mitts for the youngest), and currently waiting on a scarf answer from my brother-in-law.

***to be continued***

What kind of gifts do you usually do for children? I've been trying to draw ideas from my own childhood, but being a kid nowadays is a whole different story than those of us who were kids in the 80s and 90s. I also never really had winter until I moved to Oregon from Southern California, and I still have issues grasping winter wear for me, let alone people who are nearly three decades younger than me.